Coming back to Suwannaphum, the small town in northeast Thailand where I first taught English, always makes me feel like a celebrity. In much the same way loyal customers return to Starbucks, day after day, to enjoy their ready-made drink, I am surprised that after a year of absence my friend at the local coffee shop still remembers mine; the woman behind my favorite food stand at the market greets me with a smile of recognition, and the woman at the bus stop greets me by name.
When I return to school to see my old co-workers, welcome smiles and loads of flattery is fired my way. Even people I regrettably don’t recognize, including the school janitor, remember my name.
Pussadee, my old co-worker and the main person I came back to visit, exclaims, “You’re so popular, Jess!” each time I’m shocked at how well I’m remembered.
“I guess I just have to come to Suwannaphum to feel like royalty!” I say.
Me, taking full advantage of my royalty status in traditional Thai costume, in 2011 during Loy Krathong. Read about my lady-boy makeover here.
I’ve returned twice since my first departure, and I love that I never have to walk more than a few blocks before someone will undoubtedly give me a ride to wherever it is I’m headed. I never have to worry about getting enough to eat, as I am overfed multiple times a day, and I never have to stress about a place to stay, as offers extend from every friend I made in the short while I was here.
This place really can make a girl feel like a celebrity… until her friends bring on the real, brutal, honesty.
“Oh, Jess! You look so fat!”
“Jess, your face is so round.”
“Wow, Jess. You’re skin…it’s so pale!”
I guess fame always has its ups and downs. (Hey, Britney, I completely understand.)
That last, of course, is the ultimate compliment in most, if not all, Asian cultures. Collectively, they spend millions on skin whitening products and try their hardest to stay out of the sun, even using umbrellas to help with this often impossible task in tropical Thailand.
Pussadee and her daughter using umbrella under the hot sun.
Nevertheless, this knowledge doesn’t prevent me from returning the stab.
“I’m going to the beach for the next three weeks,” I reply, “so I’m going to lay under the sun for hours each day to soak up the sun and get dark, like you!”
It is a compliment to my western counterparts, but I’m well aware that their reaction will be much like mine when they call me fat. It stings, if only a little, and then we laugh about our cultural differences.
My friends in Suwannaphum have a way of boosting a girls’ ego to the highest extreme, and then popping her bubble with just a few words. Oddly, I love them for both. And like a celebrity who can’t stay out of the media, I vow to return again and again, because their unwavering ability to make me feel at home, like family, far outweighs their unintentional negativity.
Other MissAdventures
Related articles
- 10 Things I’ll Miss About Living in Thailand (storiesfromtheast.blogspot.com)
- This is Why I’m Fat (klinesc.blogspot.com)
- Back to Thailand. (murvictravel.wordpress.com)
“You’re Fat!” And other compliments in Thailand
Written by:Jessica J. Hill
This is SO spot on!! I hear these subtle ‘insults’ daily. “Teacher, are you tired today?” “You look sick today.”: “You’re so big!” And my favorite, “Your feet are bigger than mine.” 🙂 I used to get offended but now I just laugh. My lovely Thai friends and students don’t mean to offend, they’re just saying what pops into their heads. And, speaking of white skin, I got somewhat of a tan from Koh Mak and several students were disappointed that I’m not super white anymore. Ha! 🙂
Yes, sometimes it’s hard to take, but we have to remember they don’t mean to offend. I’m quite pale after several months in China and northern India where it was cold, so they love my skin….but westerners tend to think we look sickly when we’re pale!
I just got a substitute teaching position in Trat, which confirms my decision to go to Koh Mak after, thanks to you! I hope I come back with a tan as good as yours!
Jessica, as usual, my mind pictures a bunch of people complimenting you every where you go. After grad-school in Colorado, you’ll certainly be ready to teach writing.
That might be the best couple of compliments I’ve ever received – THANK YOU! And I hope you’re right 😉
Haha I love this post. It makes me laugh. I love how you relate to the Thais through two completely different backgrounds. This means you are lovable in every culture! But I already knew that!
Haha, you’re so sweet. Thanks girl.
Ha, I got comments about my weight SO often when I was last back in Asia visiting family (I’m practically skeletal by Western standards but tubby by Asians).
It’s crazy how our cultural standards are so different! It must be interesting for you, having a foot in both. Are you from China?
I literally just came across the comment you left on my blog post from last year! Thanks for the shout out + trust that your beauty crosses boundaries for those who truly see it 🙂
Thanks, Sara!